A List or Two I decided Not To Send @PleasedontStare
Aight, so apparently Tumblr is fulla fucking shit.
I was just about finished with this fucking great, “Guess Who’s Bizzack” post, replete with my signature wit, angry goon-related commentary, and overall awesomeness that could only be derived from one of the last remaining Tony Yayo fans on the planet.
And then Tumblr fucking crashed.
And then it wouldn’t let me retrieve the post.
So anyway, my fault for being gone so long- I just bought a house, got my yung buls in school, and am in the process of setting up my fucking man cave to hide me from the rest of the world. Look for more frequent posts and some work from me over at the homie Ben ha Meen aka @PleasedontStare website coming real soon. Good brother, good dude, and amazing DJ, not in that order.
This post was actually inspired by a write-up I’m finishing up for him right now- He asked me for some end-of-the-year lists as comment pieces, but honestly, I hate pretty much everything that doesn’t talk about moving weight, shooting people, and possible home invasions, so I knew most lists I came up with would be the opposite of what most sheep seem to post about come this time of year.
So I came up with something different. 3 differents actually.
But only one of them would end up with a post from Ben, because honestly, while I don’t give a fuck about my “brand” or my “voice,” he does (and rightfully so), so here are my two lists I decided not to send to Ben.
10 Rappers No Fucking Blog site, Twitter Dickhead, or self-styled “critic” can convince me to listen to*:
1. Emilio Rojas
- If I wanna listen to a spanish nigga rap, I’ll listen to Pun. If I wanna hear a shitty spanish nigga rap, I’ll listen to Termanology.
And I’ll NEVER listen to Termanology, especially after he ruined one of Preemo’s last dope beats, smh.
2. ASAP Rocky
- So I heard his verse on Bank’s “Stack That Paper” and the only thing I thought was, ” I thought this nigga said NY rappers are stale and boring?” Be CLEAR, I fuck with RNT/Yams Heavy- real good dude, and I respect his movement. I want his team to succeed cuz he’s a good brother.
I just don’t think Rocky or any of these other niggas are interesting.
Plus, ASAP sounds like a Halo Clan Name, b. *Shrugs*
3. Jon Connor
- So what he has a Nas co-sign? Did that help Nashawn? or the Bravehearts? or Quan (who I thought was dope)? FOH.
4. Mr. Esquire
- Come on bro… this nigga actually said him and Ghostface Kizza » Rae & Ghost…
*turns blank stare up even louder* (c) SPITGAME
5. Matthew Oregano or whatever the fuck his name is
- I must admit that I can give almost any boring NY rapper a chance. Hell, I once downloaded a Skyzoo song (I know, I know) and actually stayed awake throughout that entire Torae Double Barrel album (I know, I know), but fuck, this guy needs to take Chris Wallace’s advice, b.
6. Two Titty Chainz Boi
- Sooooooooooooooo… I’m the ONLY person who remembers when this wack nigga was wack and niggas knew he was wack???
And this nigga changed his name to an even more slavery filled moniker than his first idiotic name, coons it up like the reincarnation of Big Sam and Lil Bo, and its ok?
K. I’ll keep my memories of not knowing who the fuck was rapping while waiting for Dwayne to spit his hook on “Duffle Bag Boy.”
- Be clear: I don’t have a particular problem with K Dot… I just think he’s about as interesting as watching a cat get raped by a dog with a clown wig on. Uninteresting rapper is uninteresting, and bloggers seemed to fall all over themselves to make people believe this nigga was doper than Schoolboy Q or Ab Soul, when he couldn’t even hold their chucks (wit no laces, natch).
- Niggas can’t be fucking serious, b. This nigga? This nigga HERE?
Where’s Charles Hamilton, b???? Somebody get that dopehead in the fucking stu and keep weirdo niggas like this FAR AWAY from all microphone and recording devices.
- Are all canadians just destined to make shitty music, b? Peace to the homie Doobiys (FPG3 coming soon!), but this kizza (nigga? Jew?) took the worst parts of Aubrey and combined it with a lead pipe fucking his throat as operated by an insane Johnny 5, then had the nerve to remake (RIP) Michael Jackson’s “Dirty Diana”….
Think about that shit— this fucking faggot remade “Dirty Diana”… Crackers got all sorts of pissed at Cee-Lo for changing a couple words in a dead crackers song, but you niggers (yea, Niggers, ya’ll get the “er” for this bullshit) praised this homo for butchering a classic from one of our legends.
Fuck ya’ll, and fuck him b.
10. Whoever the hell Dart Adams keeps retweeting into my timeline.
- I ain’t in the mood for all the BS super-syllable rappity rap. Keep that “Lyrical Miracle/Spiritual” nonsense for the old me back in 1999, when I was just leaving the hood and going to college on my Higher Learning shit, before I realized the freakum heaux didn’t want to hear 7L & Esoteric (I know, I know), they wanted to drop it like its hot.
*Note- I gave a couple of these niggas a chance on a whim, and was pretty much justified in never listening to their bullshit again.
Part II Coming Tomorrow.